Payback
by Kohaku no Hime
Summary: Seto learns what happens when he breaks a promise one rainy morning. No pairings, slightly crack, story edited 10/2011.


_Ohhh, boy. _

_This is another one of my older fics that I've had up forever and said, "Oh, I'll fix this one day," but never got around to. Then I started to reread it after getting a review for it for the first time in…well, months…I decided it needed a makeover in the worst possible way._

_On another note, "Sato" in Japanese means "Sugar." You'll see why I mention this here in a little bit._

* * *

Rain was falling in steady sheets when Seto woke up that morning. He groaned and rolled over on his side, ignoring his alarm clock and willing himself to go back to sleep. He had spent yet another late night at Kaiba Corporation and he was exhausted. Also, he did not want to meet either Noa or Mokuba; he had promised them he would be back early to watch a movie, but then his board of directors had thrown a curveball and he'd been forced to rescind on that promise.

Seto frowned as his alarm clock continued to go off. If it didn't shut off soon it would die a horrible and painful death, and he would—

_"I'm a Barbie girl, In a Barbie world…"_

Most would react to the alarm clock (and the song on it) going off by simply having their eyes snap open and glaring at the device before turning it off.

Seto was not most people.

He was out of the bed in three seconds, throwing the alarm clock against the wall with a very well thrown pitch across the room. The alarm clock shattered into several pieces and blissful silence fell. He stared at where the remains of the clock lay with narrowed blue eyes.

His bedroom door opened at that point and Mokuba's head peeked around the corner. "Big sister, what happened? Are you alright?" he asked, blue-gray eyes full of concern.

"Yes I'm—wait a minute. Did you just call me 'sister'?" asked Seto with an arched eyebrow, looking at Mokuba for confirmation. The younger boy nodded enthusiastically, beaming up at him with a warm smile.

Deciding that his younger brother was not quite awake yet, he said, "Mokuba, I'm a—"

At that point Seto stopped speaking, beginning to frown; why did his voice sound so high pitched? Something in the corner of his vision caught his attention and he glanced around his room, gasping in spite of himself.

Pink.

His room…his bedroom was _bubblegum pink._

His bed was pink, his pillows were pink, his blankets were pink…everything he had in the room was pink (and even had some lace on it, much to his very well concealed horror). Stuffed animals had replaced the computer he kept on the desk and posters of different boy bands hung on the walls.

"Mokuba, I'm going back to bed because I think I'm having a nightmare and I really am quite terrified. Could you leave for a minute?" he asked.

Mokuba nodded, seemingly unfazed by his brother's actions. "Sure, Sato," he said cheerily, closing the door behind him.

_Sato? What new horror is this? My name is not Sato._

He debated for a moment, then swiftly crossed to his dresser and opened it. He began digging through it but paused as his hand brushed against something silky. If it wasn't for the fact that he knew that his silk socks were in a different drawer he'd be inclined to say that was it.

A pink pair of girl's silk panties was sitting in his hand when he pulled it out for inspection.

With a grimace he dropped them onto the carpet (which was also disgustingly pink). He made a mental note to burn them later as he gingerly picked them up with two fingers and set it carefully back in the drawer.

"If this is a nightmare, I would very much like to wake up now," he said aloud, hoping his subconscious would hear him. Deciding that it needed some help, he closed his eyes and pinched a fold of skin on his arm tightly for thirty seconds.

He opened his eyes and looked around expectantly. "…Nope. Still dreaming."

His gaze wandered to the bathroom. He was actually quite afraid to go in there (if his bedroom looked like this, Lord only knew what his bathroom looked like), but then he'd never been a coward before and this nightmare wasn't going to make him one.

As he walked inside he spotted that the counter top was littered with make-up jars, lipstick containers, and what suspiciously looked like a tampon (yet another thing to burn when he got the chance). His cobalt eyes went to the mirror and he froze, staring in disbelief.

His hair…what…Oh come on, Subconscious, this was getting ridiculous!

Seto tentatively reached for a strand of his (now chin length and styled like Anzu's) hair, hoping that this was a really elaborate wig; unfortunately, the tugging sensation on his scalp told him that this was not an elaborate illusion, especially since he could see the hair in his fingers.

His gaze traveled down to his chest and lingered there for a second before he returned his attention to his hair, eyeing it and debating with himself if maybe he should consider calling a psychia—_wait a minute, I have…I have…NO._

"I _really _want to wake up now!" he said, his voice even higher pitched as he backed out of the bathroom (reaching for a bathrobe as he went and pulling it on; no way was he looking at his chest longer than he had to). He went to the bed and collapse onto it, once again pinching himself.

If the upper half of his body was a woman's…no, he would not even think about that possibility because that idea was rather horrifying. "This is nothing but a dumb nightmare!" he snarled, though uncertainty laced his voice.

"Sato?"

He looked up at the concerned voices as Mokuba and Noa looked at him worriedly. "Are you okay?" said Noa, frowning at him (her?). "We thought we heard you yell—"

Seto shook his head angrily. "I am not fine. I'm on the verge of having a mental breakdown," he said, his voice rising. "My name is not Sato, it's Seto. I was born October 25, my blood type is O positive, and in case it's escaped your notice I am no longer a boy!"

Both of his brothers looked at each other, and then moved forward. Noa put a hand to Seto's head, frowning thoughtfully. "It doesn't feel like you have a fever, but maybe you ought to go back to bed…just in case," said Noa kindly.

Seto shook his head in annoyance. "I already know I'm healthy. I am not a boy anymore and I would like to know why!"

"Er…because you were born a girl?"

"No, I wasn't! I most assuredly _was not!_"

"Hey, Sato. What's two plus one?"

"I am not a girl for the five hundredth—wait, what?" Seto asked in confusion, looking up to his brother with raised eyebrows. "Surely you know the answer to that."

"No, I really don't," said Noa with a bemused look on his face. "It's weird…c'mon, Sato, you're supposed to be the genius around here, what's two plus one?"

Seto sighed with barely concealed irritation. "It's three—"

A blinding flash abruptly filled his vision and Seto let out a startled gasp, rubbing his eyes vigorously in an attempt to clear his vision. He heard Noa and Mokuba begin to laugh loudly and he opened his eyes to look at them uncertainly.

"Gotcha, Seto!" cried Mokuba, his eyes full of laughter. "I thought he would have shrieked when he saw his reflection in the bathroom."

"Nah, Seto's the stoic type. That expression on his face, though, was priceless. I'm never going to forget it, not even when I get old and grey."

Seto stared wordlessly at Mokuba and Noa, the realization hitting him hard. "You mean to tell me that this was all a joke?" he asked, though he was fairly relieved to hear it (the idea of him being a girl had quite frightened him, though he'd never admit it).

"It was payback for staying out so late and breaking your promise!" said Mokuba indignantly. "So what if the board gave you additional paperwork? A promise is a promise!"

Seto stared with a mixture of disbelief and exasperation at his youngest brother before he said faintly, "All right, you evil geniuses. How did you do all this?"

Noa grinned and walked over to Seto. He reached up and pulled something off of Seto's collar. Holding a small black disk up to Seto, he said, "Voice modification." Then he walked over to the damaged alarm clock and pushed a button Seto hadn't noticed before. Immediately, the pink room and animals vanished and his room returned to normal. "Visual modification," said Mokuba with a big grin.

"We borrowed the posters and make-up from Anzu. We bought the panties; the clerk thought Mokuba was a girl, so he let it slide."

"And my appearance?"

"Cybernetic technology. We had to drug you to make sure you were asleep, and then routed wires to your scalp and chest. We padded your chest with a couple of pillows, and if you look in the mirror, you'll notice that your 'hair' vanished when your room returned to normal. And we also took a picture of you just now," added Noa with an evil grin.

"Big brother? Are you okay?" asked Mokuba, who was slowly backing away from his the eldest Kaiba.

Seto stood up and said in a would-be calm voice, "I'm just fine. In fact, I'm doing so fine that in the next three seconds I'll try to get that camera from you. Knowing both of you you're going to run, at which point I'd like to remind you that I'm giving you three seconds."

He eyed them with an odd glitter in his eyes. "You're down to two."


End file.
